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Nerd Killer
Student @ Adekunle ajasin university
Ondo, Nigeria
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When Your Parents Never Learned How to Love Emotionally
<p style="text-align: justify; "><strong>We grow up believing that parents know it all—that they’re the blueprint of love. But what if the ones who raised you never learned how to give emotional safety? What if you’re carrying wounds from people who never meant to hurt you… but did, because they didn’t know any better?</strong></p><p style="text-align: justify; "><br></p><p style="text-align: justify; ">Let’s get honest:</p><p style="text-align: justify; ">Some people had parents who provided clothes, food, maybe even school fees—but never gave affection, open conversations, or consistent emotional validation. You learned how to survive, but not how to feel safe in love.</p><p style="text-align: justify; "><br></p><p style="text-align: justify; ">Here’s the problem:</p><p style="text-align: justify; ">You become an adult still craving a kind of love you never received. You hesitate to express pain. You struggle with vulnerability. You apologize for needing reassurance. And you think it’s your fault.</p><p style="text-align: justify; "><br></p><p style="text-align: justify; ">But it's not. You were raised in emotional silence—and silence can feel like abandonment.</p><p style="text-align: justify; "><br></p><p style="text-align: justify; ">The solution?</p><p style="text-align: justify; ">Stop romanticizing your parents’ emotional absence as strength. You’re allowed to name what you didn’t get, even if they did their best. Healing doesn’t require hate—it requires honesty.</p><p style="text-align: justify; "><br></p><p style="text-align: justify; ">Start re-parenting yourself. Learn to comfort the inner child who was taught to suppress instead of express. Speak to yourself with the tenderness you didn’t hear growing up. And most importantly, break the cycle: be the adult who feels, listens, and loves out loud.</p><p style="text-align: justify; "><br></p><p style="text-align: justify; ">You don't have to be bitter to set emotional boundaries. You don't have to cut them off to reclaim your voice. But you do have to stop gaslighting your own emotions just to keep the peace.</p><p style="text-align: justify; "><br></p><p style="text-align: justify; ">Here’s your freedom:</p><p style="text-align: justify; ">You are allowed to grow beyond the love that raised you. You are allowed to crave more than survival. And you are absolutely worthy of a love that speaks your emotional language—even if your parents never learned it.</p><p style="text-align: justify; "><br></p><p style="text-align: justify; "><br></p>
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