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In People and Society 3 min read
When Silence Screams
<p>It starts small. A flicker. A shadow at the edge of your thoughts. Left unchecked, insecurity will reshape your whole reality.</p><p><br/></p><p>One day it hit me how dangerous insecurity really is.</p><p>It doesn’t crash into your life like a storm. It seeps in like smoke through a crack, so faint you don’t notice until you’re breathing it in.</p><p>At first, it’s harmless. A passing doubt. A ripple on the surface of your mind. </p><p>But then it grows teeth.</p><p>It starts to gnaw at your peace, twisting innocent moments into threats and turning ordinary people into rivals. It doesn’t roar; it coils around your thoughts and squeezes.</p><p>The wildest part? While it’s happening, it feels like truth.</p><p>But say the thoughts out loud, and you’ll hear how absurd they sound. That’s the sinister magic of insecurity: it spins lies so convincing you don’t even realize you’re being poisoned. It’s a whispering death, a slow rot that eats away your joy.</p><p><br/></p><p>Take Tunde:</p><p>He’s sitting on the couch next to his girlfriend. She’s scrolling through her phone, a faint smile tugging at her lips.</p><p><br/></p><p>At first, he tells himself it’s nothing. But the thought slithers in:</p><p>“Why is she smiling like that? Who’s she texting?”</p><p>His chest tightens. The room feels heavier. “It’s probably another guy. She’s slipping away. She’s here, but her heart is somewhere else. I knew it, I’m not enough for her.”</p><p>Now he’s withdrawn. His words turn sharp. </p><p>When she finally looks up and asks,</p><p> “What’s wrong?”, he shrugs. “Nothing.”</p><p><br/></p><p>The truth? She was laughing at a meme her cousin sent in the family group chat.</p><p>That’s it. Nothing more.</p><p>But by then, insecurity had already done its damage. It had written a false story and soured the moment before it even had a chance to breathe.</p><p><br/></p><p>⸻</p><p>Or take Amaka at the party:</p><p>She’s holding her drink, music thumping in her chest, her friends laughing around her. For a moment, she feels light. Free. Present.</p><p>Then she sees her.</p><p>A woman across the room, confident, magnetic, so effortlessly alive it almost hurts to look at her. She’s laughing loudly, surrounded by people.</p><p>Something twists in Amaka’s gut.</p><p>“Look at her. She’s so natural. Everyone wants to be near her. My friends are probably thinking the same thing: she’s way more fun than I’ll ever be.”</p><p>The joy drains out of the night. Amaka pulls back, quiet. Her smile fades. She stops meeting her friends’ eyes, convinced they’d rather be anywhere but with her.</p><p>The truth?</p><p>The woman isn’t thinking about Amaka at all. She’s telling a silly story about her Uber driver and wondering if there’s still any jollof rice left.</p><p>But Amaka’s insecurity had already stolen her peace, spinning the moment into a cruel story where she wasn’t enough.</p><p><br/></p><p>This is what insecurity does.</p><p>It doesn’t kick down the door. It drifts in like a shadow and curls into the corners of your mind.</p><p>•A late reply feels like rejection.</p><p>•A friend’s win feels like your failure.</p><p>•A partner’s silence feels like betrayal.</p><p>It makes you pull away, lash out, or shrink not because of what’s real, but because of what fear has decided.</p><p>And yet, insecurity lies. It feeds on assumptions and half-truths, stories that collapse the moment they’re spoken aloud. Healing begins when you pause long enough to ask:</p><p> “Is this real or is this just my fear screaming in the silence?”</p><p><br/></p><p><br/></p>

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