THE MONTH I FELL IN LOVE - by Oluwatoyin Odunuyi

I guess you're waiting for the story about the prince charming and the lover-girl, and how I found love.No oh. I fell in love with myself!But guess who has less than five weeks to be an NYSC corper? This girlllll. Damn, it feels like I've been doing NYSC for two years. It's been so long! I'm ready to put the days of 'under the sun and in the rain' behind me.I do have a plan. But after I collect my certificate, I'm going straight to a restaurant, eat proper pounded Yam with Egusi and turkey, step it down with some Hollandia yoghurt, and sleep. Then I'll take a three-day break to restructure my mind… before starting work because abeg, my mind has been working overtime and this burnout is real.Also, I am accepting PRE-POP gifts, so you can make it rainnnn.But let's get to the gist today.First of all, Happy New Month (It's 13 days into the month, just let me be). We're officially in a new quarter, and honestly, God is good. So far, it has been over 100 days of His faithfulness and waking up every single morning to see His glory.First of all, Happy New Month; We're officially in a new quarter, and honestly, God is good. So far, it has been over 100 days of His faithfulness, kindness and glory.Now, let us talk about March. March felt like a shift. Like I stepped into a new version of myself. In February, I had many problems, which I thought were a result of my personality, and I decided that March wasn't going to take my mental health. So, I had prayed one prayer point every day," Let the refining fire of God move through me."Since then, I started noticing little changes, more confidence, less people-pleasing, a willingness to try new things, and the strength to actually fight for myself.And also, March was the month I fell deeply in love with myself. For some reason, I felt like the reason I was having problems was because of my personality type, which I dare to say is unique. So, I wanted to change. Let me tell you a story. I have a friend I usually reach out to and check on; Most of the time, it is always me reaching out. But because I was trying to "change myself, I suddenly thought, "Why can't she text me instead?"In adulthood, you've probably said that too. It disturbed me not to check on her. So what did I do? After all my "hard guy" attitude… I still texted her.Because that's who I am. I'm the type of person who will double- triple text you if I like you, especially if I know your life is a little rocky and you're not good with online communication.And that made me reflect on myself and my values. I'm sensitive, empathetic (to the point of sacrificing my short-term happiness for someone else). I'm a little weird (scratch that, very weird). I'm organised, and I love going the extra mile for people I love. There is a reason I'm made this way. There's a reason God formed my heart like that. So yes… March was a month of self-love and change. If that makes sense.Work-wise, I started choosing myself. I even got an offer for a content creator role, and I had to sit with myself and ask, "Do I actually like this?"And for once, I chose peace instead of money. I chose something that fits my strengths and talents.With friendships, I leaned towards intentionality. I started giving more grace and being honest with myself. Some friendships needed more effort from me, needed boundaries, and sadly, some… needed to end.Now let's talk about relationships. Because what is happening in this dating pool?? I gave someone my number, and in the next hour, he started calling me "hun."Hun?? Who is your hun?? Hun your head there😭When I asked him," Hun?"He said, "Yes, you, my darling."Ah. I got the ick immediately. And funny enough, I almost felt bad for discarding him. I thought I should "give it a chance." But I put on my big girl pants and shut that down immediately. Because it is one thing to be interested, but there is also another thing called 'being forward', and I don't like that.So now, I'm not afraid to speak up to say 'I don't like this', and I'm not afraid to walk away if it doesn't work with me. And that's okay.But yes… March really said, "I'm going to teach you how to love yourself and be better." And honestly? I thank God for that. And to some of my friends who think that I'm probably going to change from my dramatic ways, no, I won't. Love you!May the rest of your April go well!

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