TwoCents | The Girl in the Mirror - by Elizabeth Toluwanimi Olawale

Walk with me, 10 years back.I met my younger self today. She arrived too early; I got there right on time.She wore a gown, which I don't really like. She had outgrown it—she should have just asked Big Sis to give her one, even though she hated it. She wore no accessories, and her hair—she had just had a haircut after much thought and scrutiny from teachers about how quickly her hair looked unkempt. I guess she was tired of the criticism.  She sat in the farthest corner of the room, fidgeting with her feet, her hands tremble with anxiety-a feeling I know all too well. I approached her calmly, wearing a warm smile. I wore palazzo jeans, a black top, and styled my natural hair. My lips shone from the lip gloss, and I wore only a simple gold earring. I smelled lovely, felt confident, and alive. She looked at me with a curious eyes. “We can wear smart tops now?” she asked.I smiled. “Yes, we can.” I also told her, this top is not ours—it's for Big Sis. “Wow, we now wear her dresses?” I said, “Yes and we now get nice dresses for ourselves, but we just love to wear Big Sis’ own at times.” We both smiled.  After a moment of silence, I told her to sit comfortably, and look up. We are bold now, and it's not a crime to be slim. I told her we are now comfortable in our skin, focused on skincare, and don't care what people say about our stature. We can wear fitted tops now and we now own a couple of dresses. She hesitated, then asked, “Can we wear fitted trousers now?”I nodded. “Yes, in fact, we have a couple of them, and skirts too.” So, I led her to the full-length mirror adorning the restaurant wall. She refused at first but complied after some gentle persuasion. “Can we look at a full-length mirror now?” she asked in a shaky voice. “Yes, we can look at the mirror now.”We look at them daily, and Mama even joked that we might look ugly at the rate we stare at the mirror. But, we no longer worry about what people think when they see us. Thereafter, I asked her to order a meal and a drink. She chose a meat pie and a bottle of Pepsi. I smiled; we now eat good meals and take snacks far less often. Then, I ordered a plate of fried rice, jollof rice, grilled chicken, a bottle of water, and a bottle of Hollandia Yoghurt. "We don’t take soda anymore?" she asked. I smiled. "Yes, we don't. We've outgrown soda—we only go for healthy options now." She asked if we are happy now. I told her, "Yes, but sometimes we can be a bit down, and we are fighting the mood swings day by day." She asked if we still hold the same opinion related to relationships.I smiled and went silent for a while.She asked, "What was wrong?"I told her we are a few steps closer to changing that opinion. She asked if we are still confused about our career path. I smiled. "Not really, asking God about it months ago made it possible." She asked if we now know God better. I told her, "Yes, we have now given our life to Christ and have been having a good relationship with God so far." She asked about our parents. I told her they are doing well—although he never came back and drifted bit by bit, but it's fine.We don't need to bother much about that, we have friends now, we have amazing people. As we sat together, I realized how far we had come. We had grown, learned, and evolved. And in that moment, I was grateful for the journey. Then, after a long silence She stood up, move closer to me and she hugged me."I'm glad I met you, you've really grown" she says. As I hold her close, I whisper, "You are the thread that weaves my story together."And, with a gentle smile, she steps away, and I settle into a quiet reflection, tears of gratitude falling softly."I should do this more often" I whisper, my eyes following her as she disappears into the distance. Inspired by Ameenah Sanusi

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