I've spent the last few days with some good old friends. In the course of our numerous discussions, we visited the good old days, and there was just something there that I can't explain. It's like trying to draw in the air. Only artists understand the story of their craft. There were moments when we laughed so hard it hurt, and other times we were in our feelings. It's a beautiful thing when your circle gets you. Nothing beats that. Truth be told, we all need people. People are everything, and while we can't make them stay with us forever because that'll be unfair to them, we must make them know that we see and appreciate them. In those moments, my burdens were suspended as I had help lifting my cross, and even in their absence, the weight felt lighter. Sometimes a problem shared creates another one, but in other cases, sharing your issues with certain people will ease anxiety. Your problem may not go away, but you'll feel relieved, and you'll fight as though you're not alone. We've got a lot of broken people out there doing life alone because of hurt. Their journey changed because someone they were vulnerable to broke them. I know it hurts, but the best you can do is try again. Now you don't have to accept everyone or open yourself up to everyone. You'll have to grow with the lessons learned. Plant at your lowest.
I believe our desires are dynamic and often change based on who we are with. On our parents birthdays, we want to give them the world; with our significant other, we are inclined to only give them love; when we lift our children for the first time, we lose our lives and live for them; the list goes on. But wait, when we are alone, what happens? Answer honestly.
We say you only live once, yet we barely live. The truth is, we only die once. In another sense, we actually die every day.
So, what will it be: wallowing every day in grief over things you haven't accomplished, hiding your gifts because you think you're not good enough, or feeling less of yourself because of what happened a while back? Now I know that trauma is sometimes like our shadow as it follows us through life. But hey, you can beat it. You just have to try.
Our closet shouldn't be our only fan.
Please, Live Life Alive.
Be at peace with your cross.