<p>Why do I wake up every morning and decide to do a thousand things at once? Writing, managing projects, selling perfumes, making clothes, planning events. For what? Am I in a lifelong audition for “Most Stressed Human Alive”??</p><p>And don’t even get me started on my ADHD struggles. One minute I’m focused, the next I’m staring at a wall thinking about whether snails ever get tired. Then boom! Deadline in two hours. Why am I like this?</p><p>But let’s talk about my career. I’ve been a content writer, project manager, strategist, social media manager, video designer, essayist, brand influencer, and now, philosopher apparently. But ask me what I actually do, and I’ll just stare at you like a Windows XP error message. The real question is: When will I start paying myself for all these roles?</p><p>Speaking of fighting for my life, can someone explain why my love life is a documentary about disappointment? I miss someone deeply, but instead of doing anything about it, I just suffer in silence like a Shakespearean character. </p><p>And of course, there’s my academic journey. Balancing studies with a million side hustles is basically an extreme sport at this point. Food Science and Technology is not even food-friendly. Where are the free meals I signed up for?? Instead, I’m here memorizing microbiology terms like I’m training for the Spelling Bee World Cup.</p><p>But despite all this, let’s be real, I love my life. The chaos, the passion, the deep talks, the random existential crises. It’s all part of my masterpiece. I’ve built something special, not just for myself, but for the people I inspire every day. I’m evolving, I’m growing, and I’m still standing (somehow).</p><p>So here’s to another year of ambition, drama, and me questioning my life choices. Happy birthday to me! May my enemies remain confused, my bank account finally cooperate, and my ADHD take a vacation.</p><p><br></p><p><br></p><p><br></p>
Certified Unhinged Adult: The world isn’t ready!
By
Christianah Oparinde