TwoCents | Is Answering Questions Mandatory Or A Social Obligation?

Hello, world people! 👋 My name’s Belinda, and this is my first insight. Whew This is a little nerve wracking as I hope I do this first attempt justice - and that’s because I used to blog in what now seems like a lifetime ago, and didn’t do it well enough, even then. I am thankful, nonetheless, that with life comes the chance to do certain things over. Not all things of-course; but definitely things like revisiting a hobby. So, my topic of conversation today comes in form of the following question: Are questions mandatory for one to answer or are they simply social agreements? This topic was inspired by the comments section of two separate Instagram posts regarding two separate incidents. The first, revolved around a certain African American singer who hid her pregnancy for its entire duration – although there had been a lot of speculation from her fans and foes alike, on whether or not she had been truly pregnant. Turns out the speculators were right once she put to bed. She came online afterwards, soliciting advice, and dishing out some of hers on her new experience as a mother. Under the comment section of one post of the singer asking a couple of questions pertaining to motherhood, a comment stood out for me. It was full of disdain, and dismissal, shutting down her questions because to the person, she didn’t have any right to ask any; after being secretive about her pregnancy. One reply to the vitriolic comment said the singer in question, had every right to ask her fans the questions she was asking. This comment section went on to spark several debates among a bunch of virtual strangers with clearly too much time on their hands. Well, to be fair, we’re all guilty. It became “comment wars” as IG users went back and forth, sharing bits of unsolicited information, dragging each-other like Tiger gen. The second incident involved those content creator types; whose specialty is granting street interviews to random people going about their business, who I’m sure would rather be left alone. No be me talk am o!And just as with the first post, the interviews the content creator granted, sparked controversy in the comments. This was because some of the people the interviewer approached, declined to answer his questions. One person in the comment section asked why they were being rude, for to this person, once asked a question you were obligated to respond if you bothered to stop. Their logic was, if you couldn’t, then you shouldn’t stop to hear what the interviewer had to say in the first place. Another “commentator” opined that questions and its accompanying terms; are social agreements consensually agreed upon, not moral obligations, and I completely agree. Time to insert my own personal opinion, ofkess! Because why would anybody think otherwise? Nobody owes you an answer to your question and why should they? Do you own their tongues? To me, questions are social agreements, not obligations. If you were a Christian and someone asked you “if you weren’t a Christian, what religion would you practice?” It is your prerogative to not play along and just say “i wouldn't choose any other religion outside of Christianity” or simply refuse to respond if you do not consent to the conditions of the question, or are simply not in the right frame of mind to engage. Everyone has the right to set boundaries and choose how they engage in conversations. If someone feels uncomfortable answering a question or doesn't want to participate in a certain line of conversation, it's entirely within their prerogative to decline or redirect the discussion. At the end of the day, respecting each other's boundaries is fundamental to healthy communication. In summary; I however encourage courtesy and politeness in every social interaction. While you’re not obligated to respond to a question, or to even respond with respect, it is just good manners to extend some form of courtesy, at the very least, to your fellow human beings. I’m sure not everyone will even agree that you owe others good manners, but this is a topic for another day. Like my mum would say: when you’re out in the world you’re not only representing yourself, you’re representing your family, where you come from. While you’re free to decline to engage in conversations that may not serve you, and to withhold your response to any questions you don’t feel comfortable answering, do so politely. Because that is what my mother would like. I kid, I kid! No pun intended.  What do you think? Are questions mandatory to answer? Do you also believe you should answer both questions I posed above, as well as this?👀

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