I watch in horror as the meaning of words and their associations are constantly being changed into something entirely different. The most common example that comes to mind is 'Rainbow' and everything associated with it. That's a whole different topic and I wouldn't want to go into that... yet.
For today, let's take the word 'Aesthetics' into consideration. A quick dictionary search tells us that 'Aesthetics' means something concerned with beauty or an appreciation of beauty. In art terms, they are those things an artist uses to improve the overall look and beauty of his work, making it pleasing to the eye and mind. To bring it home, the aesthetics of a building, are the decor, furnishing, arrangement and adornments that we appreciate.
But like a scary movie where an evil spirit slowly takes possession of something pure and harmless and defiles it, the word 'Aesthetics' has been given a new context - People! Yes, aesthetics is now associated with human beings. We are in a world where people make friends with others for aesthetic purposes - if you don't understand, I'll explain. A guy or girl choses to be friends with another they consider 'aesthetically pleasing'. And if it seems like it makes no sense to you, that is because it doesn't.
I find it quite disturbing that value and substance are thrown outside the window in favor of who looks the most pleasing standing next to you in an Instagram photo. It gets worse, some people proudly and openly put out a call for 'aesthetically pleasing friends', I kid you not. I might need a psychologist to help me out here, is this a sign of a mental illness? Or in Nigeria lingua; is it ment?
Our obsession with surface beauty as a generation is quite appalling and that's me putting it mildly. It is what corporations take advantage of to market harmful products, and it is certainly what manipulators use to lure us into abusive relationships. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not saying beauty isn't attractive or is evil, this is definitely not one of those 'vanity upon vanity' rants.
However, picking friends based on looks is absurd. The essence of friendship is finding those we can create a special bond with, and share memories together. It is having people who offer value and impact our lives mentally, emotionally, knowledgeably, and even spiritually. When you throw all of that away, it is most likely to find yourself amongst people who you have absolutely nothing in common with. Asides the reels and pictures, it's important to have people who are genuinely willing to stand by your side.
Quite honestly, I blame social media for the increase in this anomaly; this is not to say that there weren't individuals with this mindset before social media. The gimmick of social media apps hinges on what is pleasing to the eye. Right from the creation, developers look to achieve a top notch blend of colours. Updates keep coming because there's always something to do to upgrade the quality of said app.
Now let's consider the contents uploaded by users. For an app like Instagram, lighting, filters, exotic places etc are pushed to the fore. What was once intended to be a platform for people to share photos of their regular lives, slowly morphed into an unnecessary need for validation and conflict for who has the perfect life and who doesn't.
Somehow that shaped us and transcended into real life. We now want real life adornments for our lives, and it comes in the form of people. If Mr. A doesn't fit, you have to run through different people till you find those that fit. Probably, we might wake up one day to discover that there's been a barricade separating the beautiful ones from the rest.
If you're one of those who fall into this category of aesthetic hunters, I already know what your response to this insight would be. You'd most likely conclude that I'm not 'fine', therefore this is the ranting of a pained man. It's a gaslighting technique and I'm sorry I won't fall for it - I take it as a duty to call out as much anomalies as I can.
I sincerely hope one day we snap out of our obsession with surface appearances and start to appreciate humans for their essence.